I like the idea of straight lines.

So much so…
I find them visually soothing.

I’m drawn to them.

In no place more
Than when it comes to
My habits, goals & desires.

I want to:
– Figure out what I want or need to do
– Make a plan
– Go straight towards the goal or forward with action.

This is how I arranged my life
For quite a long time

Until I gained enough awareness to realize –

I was getting what I wanted
(So focused on it was I)

Only to find out
It wasn’t really what I wanted.

A process which left me
Discontent & dissatisfied.

Only now have I gained the wisdom
To stop along my way.

To never attach myself
To a path or a plan –

A certain approach or way.

Instead I consistently ask…

Is this what I want now?
Is this what is best for me?

Knowing full well,
Both can & do
Easily & quickly change.

This brings me to the fundamental
Issue with self care.

What we need changes

Moment to moment
Day to day.

To make matters more difficult,
Surface level desires hide truths
Lying dormant inside.

We want & do things for a purpose.

We usually understand only
The shallowest, most surface level why.

When truly caring for our needs demands

We know ourselves.
We listen to ourselves.
We tune other’s expectations, advice, potential judgement out.

And, we are kind enough to ourselves
That we allow ourselves
To head down the path
Where our spirit & soul belong.

This path is never straight.
It’s full of twists & turns.

Often we won’t know the next step
Until the moment it arrives.

Where it will take us…
What it will ask of us…

Will always be a surprise.

As I try to ready myself
To fall fully into my course for the year,

I hold this truth
Close & near.

Each moment our bodies & lives speak
If we choose to hear.

The path best for us
Hides behind all the things
The ego wants & fears.

Following the ego
We’ll end up empty inside.

Follow our inner wisdom,
Life will get better.

And, we’ll feel more fully
Connected & alive.

 
Christie
Christie
Obvious self care enthusiast. Long time yoga practitioner. Introvert. Avid reader. Obsessive learner. Perpetual student.

Also blogging at accountableformyself.com

Read more about my personal journey.

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