(4:45am) Time has accelerated. Jettisoned into the future, everything & everyone around me has aged. I look at myself in the mirror barely recognizing myself. I wake.
The kitchen counter cluttered by the lingering contents of the half emptied cabinets, I sigh as I acknowledge the parallel to life.
I start something (something good, positive… something to help) only to become quickly overwhelmed.
This feeling of overwhelm drapes over me like a fog following me around, weighing me down.
Overwhelm, at it’s full force, paralyzes me, which is why it must be addressed.
Anything with that much power & impact irrevocably affects my health.
At dinner with a friend & work colleague, my friend shared (what he perceived as) one of my unique traits – an ability to focus on both the big picture while also being extremely detailed oriented.
Details matter. Details are the legos that build our future.
In terms of self care, the details that matter can be those that easily slip by leaving an invisible physiological & psychological trace.
What have I done? I ask myself as I look at the cluttered counter. =>
What do I do with all this? (As I momentarily contemplate putting it back from where it came.) A thought leading to mental (followed by physical) fatigue. =>
It’s too much for me. My mind & body begin to shut down. =>
In a cloud of fatigue, my thoughts spiral down. Out of control. Quickly taking me to a small, enclosed, trapped space.
My goal: To forever be free.
To use the power of my mind to cleanse, heal & enliven me.
What’s this have to do with extreme self care? Maybe it’s not clear.
Extreme self care involves addressing everything.
It involves going above & beyond in the quest for health requiring you to change internal & external components of your life.
Changing your thoughts, emotions, reactions, actions & behaviors to those that benefit (instead of harm) you.
Just like each dish, you ask…
Is this worth keeping?
Do I love this?
Is this helping me by positively affecting my health?
Is it potentially causing more harm than good?
The answers give direction. As I keep this in mind…
We are always either moving towards or away (in terms of physical reality & mind.)
The choice: Mine.
It’s a game for my health, for my life…
I must choose wisely not only to survive, but also thrive.
I look at my kitchen counter filled with dishes to either pack or give away. The clutter visually overstimulates me. I want to turn & walk away. Instead, I stay.
I close my eyes. Elongate & center my breath. Open my eyes. Tell myself, “Relax. You can do this.” I take another breath. And, from a place of calm begin to work. Reminding myself that each dish symbolizes a (powerful, potentially life changing) choice.